19 Comments

Wow! Brilliant! Accepting responsibility is the key because it does give you the control back. It seems to me that when people think about accepting responsibility for the things that happened to them when they were too young to protect themselves means that what happened was their fault. We equate fault with blame and blame with being bad but that's not what accepting responsibility means. It means choosing to deal with and resolve the past from an adult perspective. As an adult, we have the free will to choose to forgive ourselves, and then, once we have done that, extend the forgiveness to others because we know what it feels like to be in their shoes. That, I believe is what Jesus meant when he told us to take the log out of our own eye first. Know thyself - right?

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Yes, yes, yes! and that LOG in our eye! A giant plank! As a friend said to me many years ago, “be the big ship in the ocean and not hanging on the log in the sea.” Take responsibility and forge ahead!! Thank you for reading and for your great comment! ox

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Beautiful, Deb, you always weave beautiful articles. Yes, God always answers prayers. No.. it’s not always the answer you wanted. Sometimes it’s hard not to throw a temper tantrum when you don’t get your way, too 😂

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I'm honored that I could contribute to the creation of something like this. Nicely done

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Thank you so much Coleman! I know this stuff doesn't always go over well with many people (or probably the use of Jim Carey, who’s gone nuts lately 🤪) but your interview with Alex and that answer to question 6 gave me a lot to think about. I have shared it with many struggling friends. I was already there but it was a confirmation that beauty and peace comes from taking 100 hundred percent responsibility for your life. It's really hard to see that kind of hope in the midst of brain fog, sadness, anger, ill health (which mostly comes from holding onto to stress) etc., but it's most definitely the outcome. I really appreciate you. ox

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A lot of people hate my position on that and I've gotten a crazy amount of push back on it I er the years. Then I looked at the people who hated it and it only made me double down because they've all been miserable. The fact that they hated me for saying it only convinced me that I was right

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100 percent.

Sooo for several years I had hired this awesome Christian guy/photographer to work with me on various jobs. We'd get into talks on the road, about life, family, pains, etc. He'd always say "you have to die to your flesh." I'd be like 🤔 still going to church, crazy busy shooting, taking 3 kids everywhere while John worked unGodly hours (still is) and "not get it." Your answer was exactly that. You're walking it. Get yourself out of the way and accept all the crap as your fault and start over. It will reveal a whole new way of loving and living. Like I said, I was surrendering 🏳️ and life was feeling so much better but your answer was right in the thick of the beauty I was finally experiencing and enjoying. ox

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It’s a tough pill to swallow to take total responsibility but I found freedom there. When I blamed others I let them control me. Taking responsibility takes the power back.

Viktor Frankl illustrated this in Man’s Search for Meaning. Everything can be taken away other than your will to choose how you’ll think about even life’s greatest tragedies.

I’ve asked God for things over the years that I didn’t get. I was upset. Now I look back and see that those things would have been terrible for me. I was being protected and I didn’t know it. Now I ask Him to be in the driver’s seat because I’m a dummy most of the time!

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Alison, you are spot on. It is a tough pill to swallow. And you are so right about blaming others meaning you let them take control! That's it exactly! I'm such a dummy half the time too, knowing full well now that many things were not meant to be or for me! And like I just got through telling someone here - I'm honest, I'm gonna say it like it is. It's not about getting caught up in religion, it's about getting caught up in Love. In Christ, in sacrifice. In looking at that as a way of saying "He took it all" and so can we. We can do this in order to live and live well, even with all the crap life throws at us. It's heavy, deep and we have to stay on track. The world grabs us all out of nowhere. And what Viktor Frankl said. Yes. Everything. I think of the concentration camp survivor stories and how many said, "nothing could take away their mind or their will to survive." Through all the pain, torture - they had a mind and a will. Thank you so much for this and I need to catchup with your writing. I am really looking forward to your first piece on Lighthouse! ox

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Thank you! This is truly a blessing and I’m so grateful to be working together for Lighthouse.

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Love how you tied it together, I agree with this philosophy and also what you said about prayer, took me a while to understand it in life, I truly understood after reading Silence.

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I’m reading Silence now!

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Yes!

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It was fun to write as these snippets of movies came into my mind for some reason. I think John and I were talking one night and I saw Bruce Almighty and the chaos if everyone got their way. It lead me on a spaghetti noodle. Or if you Give A Mouse A Cookie (or me!). I learned early on that He always answers. My dad had a fair amount of “no,” but he also gave me some solid “yes” moments. I treasured those. I believe that’s the key. God as a good Father. Thank you Alex! ox

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A nice reminder... Just came in right ✅🍀

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There you are! Yay, I had a lot of fun with it. It's all so true though and thank you so much for this. Don't you love those 80's videos! ha ha! Hope you had an awesome trip! Or are you still traveling? Sending you a big hug! ox

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Yeah those 80' are awesome! 😊 I'm back since a week and busy with admin work, running from customs to tax offices etc... to become a legal Imigrant to Greece haha 😆

Almost through! And I'm so happy! Big hug back to you! Will soon be back to writing ✅🍀🍀🍀🍀

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NO WAY! You are making a life move! yay! You sound really happy and that’s the best feeling in the world. Gotta live while you can! I am so happy for you and can’t wait to see you here writing again! oxox

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Jun 19
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Thank you Teresa! I so appreciate it! It was fun to write :)

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